


Running Up That Hill

by CassanderRoshack



Series: My Clarity [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-17
Updated: 2014-09-17
Packaged: 2018-02-17 17:15:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2317136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CassanderRoshack/pseuds/CassanderRoshack
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to Clarity.</p><p>Dirk and Jake are slowly getting back to their relationship. The gang is back again, though this time... it might involve a hospital and dating!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Running Up That Hill

                "Dirk's been avoiding me since the kiss." He sighed to Jane who frowned, "He has?" Jake nodded, "At least I think so. I thought he wanted us back together. Now I'm just confused." Jane took the cookies out of the oven and offered him once they cooled. "I think he's scared of repeating what happened before." She held up a finger to give her a chance to finish her thought, "Before you thought he was overbearing. So now he's giving you a lot of space. We're out of the game so he's trying to give you a lot of time to do what you want. But." She took a cookie for herself since it was a brand new batch she was now testing the recipe for. "I think he still wants to be close to you he just doesn't know how to act around you now. He loves you a lot but doesn't know how to show it. How do you like the cookies?" Jake took one of the cookies and took a bite, wincing slightly. “What is this?” Jane shook her head, still chewing and examining the cookie. “Coconut, sugar, crème soda and strawberry…” Jake tried to smile but didn’t manage it, Jane nodded in agreement. “I think I’ll just lose that recipe.” He nodded again and put the nibbled on cookie back on the pan and before tossing her own into the trashcan.

                “So I should probably go back and talk to Dirk and see if he wants to… spend time together?” Jake asked and Jane shrugged, “That’s up to you. I know if I was Dirk after all this I would love to spend time with you.” She hinted at him to go see him and he sighed, “Alright, I just don’t know what to talk to him about honestly. He’s so bloody hard to read sometimes.” Jane pursed her lips in thought then went ‘ah ha!’ very comically. “What did you talk about before you started dating? What does he like?” The other paused before shaking his head while listing things, “We didn’t talk about much besides the game, dating, ironic references and mechanics. He likes cartoons, horses, robots, raping, ironic references, movies and… puppets.” Jake glanced at Jane and she still had he smile on her face, “Any of those you could start a conversation in- especially movies.”

                He perked up at that. “That’s an idea! I’ll bring some of his favorite movies and orange juice! He’ll love it.” Jake popped off the little stool in Jane’s apartment as Roxy walked in yawning. “Mor-morning~!” She repeated before completely saying the word tiredly. Jake kissed Jane on the cheek before going to the refrigerator and taking out the fresh cartoon of orange juice- all of them had each other’s favorite drunk in their fridge for when they often hung out together in their own apartments. Hot chocolate for Roxy, water for Jake (though he would sometimes drink green sodas that Dirk found in the city), soda for Jane and anything- preferably orange juice- for Dirk were the usual selection for the group. He kissed Roxy on the cheek as he headed out the door with a ‘good morning to you’ immediately afterward. As Jake walked out just to hear Roxy compliment how good the new batch of cookies was and Jane to ask if she was feeling alright.

                Jake had smile on his face as he headed toward Dirk’s apartment door after obtaining the movies from his place. Everyone except Dirk usually had their door’s wide open since they pretty much owned the entire floor- though Jake and the other’s knew he did it more out of habit than necessity. He knocked on the door with no answer and frowned little, Dirk hadn’t left his room in almost five days so he determined he had cause to walk in. Dirk lay on the couch, singing soft stuffy nose versions of Love You like a Love Song. "You are beautiful~ Like a dream come alive~ So incredibly- sinful- miracle- lyrical. Save my life again~ I wancha to know..." He coughed and groaned, "I Love You like a Love Song, Baby~!" He nearly crumbled over with a cough and shut his eyes, curtains shut tight and cartoons playing on the television. "Dirk?" Jake asked and he sat up, red nose brilliant shining like his orange eyes. "J-Jake?! Oh- Shit- Hi- Uh-" He looked around widely that the apartment was a mess- which it was with the small mountains of tissues and tools everywhere. "It's okay. I brought orange juice." He smiled at him, adding, “And movies!” Dirk blushed before turning his face away to cough, “I’m kinda…” Jake chuckled, “Sick?” The blond nodded, looking low as if he didn’t want him to leave but didn’t want him to be sick either. “Well then, I’m just going to have to get you well before I get sick then.” He came closer to him, biting his lip looking around. Dirk winced, “I can clean-.” And immediately went into a coughing fit.  
  
                "It's fine, Dirk." He smiled slightly and looked at the other, "Listen, old chap... I wanted to say I was sorry." Dirk went still, pure worry on his features. Did he mean the kiss? "I shouldn't have avoided you back then. That was preposterous and I was an asshole about it afterward. We should have talked and sorted it out but I was too much of a pansy to talk to you. You deserve an apology. Holy molly... You deserve probably immensely more than that. Jane and Roxy too but..." Dirk reached out and took Jake's hand in his, holding to two of his finger tips with his own and examining his hand slowly, "I made you feel pressured all the time because of my horrible personality. I forced us both to be together in the first place and that was outright complete horseshit." He looked up at him, orange eyes searching his, "Can I say we mutually fucked up pretty fucking spectacularly and..." Jake nodded, "Jake, I'm sorry too... For everything." Dirk let his voice drop after that, lump forming in his throat as Jake brushed his hand through his hair, "Me too, mate..." He whispered and placed a gentle kiss on his nose, "Start over?" Dirk smiled at him before nodding. “Sounds awesome.”

                They sat down to watch movies for several hours as Dirk accumulated a mountain of tissues and coughing fits. He groaned, “I’m totally not great to hang out with, huh…” He coughed into his hand and sighed softly, the sound of his lungs gurgling as he breathed out. Jake frowned rubbing his back, “You don’t sound so good, Dirk. Perhaps you should go see the doctor I get my peanut allergy medication from…” Dirk shook his head, “I don’t need to go to the doc. I’m fine.” He coughed again and shook his head, lying back down on the couch where Jake had allowed his head in his lap. Jake frowned a bit before smiling, “I know! Lay down flat- well, as much as you can without suffocating- and I’ll rub your back. I heard that it helps people with blood flow.” Dirk grunted as Jake got up and he stretched out on the couch. Jake frowned, "You're really stiff, Dirk." He said softly to him, stilling rubbing his shoulders. Dirk snorted, "Striders are extremely flexible. Especially me.” The green eyed man had to laugh about that. “You are the most flexible person I know- I know that from experience but you’re still stiffer than a board that has been petrified.” Dirk moaned as he rubbed his back and there was a pop. “Jesus Dirk, you sound like rice crispies…”

                The blond groaned again, “I turn into a cereal when I’m sick. Great.” Jake shook his head, still keeping up his ministrations on his back. “It’s not that bad… I’ll work out the tension; hopefully you’ll feel better afterward. I’ll tell Jane to make something warm for dinner and full of garlic.” Dirk made a face at garlic but shrugged all the same, as long as he didn’t taste it he was fine. He didn’t mention his dislike for garlic to avoid the vampire jokes from the others. He already never opened the curtains and he was almost as pale as Roxy who was already classified as albino in most cultures.

                Dirk rubbed his eyes when they both lapsed into silence. His orange eyes flickered back to look at the green that watched his hands rub into the white shirt. “Sorry.” He murmured again, turning his face into the couch but having to immediately turn it back to breath. Jake looked up at him, “For what, Dirk?” There was a sigh from beneath him, “In the world of options of ‘A’ through ‘D’- I pick ‘E’, for all of the above.” Jake leaned down and kissed the back of his neck gently, “Dirk… we’ve said our sorries. We both made a mistake and we’re here now. Together. I’m here with you and I don’t mind doing this for you.” Orange met green, frown met a smile and Dirk shifted a bit so Jake slid from his lower back down to the backs of his thighs, twisting to press a kiss into his collar bone. “Thank you.” Jake brought up a hand to push his blond spikey hair back as he looked down at him. “Of course.”

                Jake ended up staying with Dirk that night. Wrapping up the other when he started shivering, Jake grew more and more worried about the other. He felt his forehead in his sleep, feeling the clamminess and tone of his skin. After a few moments he got up to mention it to Roxy and Jane that he was staying over with Dirk since he was so sick. They both nodded, frowns on their face as well. It was rare when one of them got sick- extremely so. The group was usually very tidy when it concerned their apartments- the boys needed help from time to time- and it was only allergy season when one or two of them caught the minor cold. Though that was in Spring and certainly not in Summer like it was now. Jake returned to Dirk’s side, strong enough to easily pick him up and take him to bed, cuddling up beside him He acted like a heater for the other and rarely used the covers. Dirk had fitful dreams that Jake watched sometimes tensely. Neither of the girls knew that Dirk talked in his sleep constantly. Jake snored- according to Dirk- like a lion with asthma, but Dirk damn near gave speeches. The darker skinned man rubbed his back at times when Dirk would call out or mumble about severed heads.

                They all had their nightmares- the game had taken its toll on each of them in a way. That was why they had agreed to move in with Dirk’s pre-scratch self’s apartment in Austin, Texas, together. None of them wanted to be alone anymore and it had a bit of everything they needed. A hot environment, a room for plants, a big kitchen, a free reign on pet policy and plenty of room for the four of them to have their own room. They’d agreed and stayed on their floor of the building, never really going outside for anything other than supplies and medical things like Jake’s epipen and Dirk’s depression medication. Jake felt his heart hurt at the idea of Dirk on medication. It was obvious when he didn’t take it how badly he needed it but… he’d never told Jake about it. He’d found out from a not so sober Roxy when she’d originally bought the pill case for him. It had led to another argument but it had always bothered him that Dirk had never told him about something that important when he trusted the other with his epipen spare. He supposed it didn’t really matter now.

                Eventually Dirk woke up calling for Jake and he reassured that he was still there. Dirk was still half-asleep in a way, muttering about the black chess pieces before going back to sleep again cuddled in Jake’s arms. He didn’t know really why he was staying awake to watch over Dirk, perhaps he wasn’t tired or even that he had just missed being with Dirk when he didn’t have snappy indifference or sarcasm to accompany any action he did. The other man eventually settled enough that Jake was sure he could sleep without Dirk waking in a nightmare and settled down beside him, arm wrapped around his waist gently, keeping an ear out for the sound of Dirk’s breathing and heartbeat. He had no idea how much he’d actually missed that sound.

 ~~~

                Jane came by in the morning to check on them, peeking her head in after a knock. Dirk grunted and Jake was the one who sat up to address her, “Ello, what’s going on?” He asked tiredly and the woman smiled, “Roxy and I are going to go to town, we’re missing some supplies and she wants to go shopping. Either of your coming or need us to pick up anything?” Dirk waved his hand, “I’ll come.” He mumbled tiredly, snuggling back against Jake. “I need to pick up some stuff too.” Jane nodded, “Roxy is still getting ready, so take your time, Dirk.” He mumbled a ‘thanks’ that was barely able to be heard from his face being in the pillow. Jake rubbed his back, “I’ll come too.” He told Jane and she left to let them get ready. Dirk turned around and smiled at Jake, “You stayed…” The blond commented and Jake dutifully nodded, “Of course.” There was a heartwarming affect to that and Dirk stretched his neck to kiss underneath Jake’s chin before getting up- wobbling- and picked his sunglasses from the bedside table where Jake’s own glasses were resting beside them. He wanted to take a picture of that for some reason. It was just so perfect the way both of their glasses were there on the side of the bed.

                After twin sets of showers in their own apartments, Jake and Dirk were ready. Jake mentioned he had forgotten his wallet and Dirk agreed to wait at the top of the stairs- one of these days he was going to fix the elevator. They made most of their money by internet dealings. Jake sold plants and toy guns- never real ones- for stores while Dirk did his puppet empire, Roxy sold handmade cat trinkets (everything from jewelry to statues and sometimes special wizard statues too), and Jane of course handled everything bakery wise. It supported them quite well though the mailman tended to hate them from the sheer number of delivery boxes they sometimes had to ship out. No one was willing to walk the stairs to deliver the number of groceries either. He again reminded himself that the elevator definitely needed to be fixed or they’d lose a mailman soon too. He walked by the Jane’s apartment on the way to the door to the stairs- the door wide open as usual- and overheard their conversation while they looked at dresses online for a dress shop that was downtown.

                Jane sighed speaking softly to Roxy, "I'm too fat to be pretty, Roxstar..." Dirk coughed for a moment before completely coming to a stop with his leg half up in the air to take the next step. His head snapped toward the open door- Roxy voiced her opinion that she felt the same way about herself and wondered if they were ever going to be loved. Dirk let out a banshee yell that made Frigglish and Beck head's raise with twin jerking movements from where they were curled together on a doggie bed, "HEY!" Jane and Roxy immediately looked toward him as he climbed on top the countertop and pointed at both of them, one hand still in the hoodie he was wearing that may or may not have originally been Jake’s. "ANY MAN WHO GETS TO EVEN LOOK IN YOUR DIRECTION IS UNBELIEVABLY LUCKY. YOU BOTH ARE BEAUTIFUL, INTELLIGENT, RESPECTABLE, AND FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC. DON'T EVER COUNT YOURSELF DOWN BECAUSE YOU'RE SEXY AND CURVATIOUS. UNDERSTOOD?" When they nodded he turned, jumped off the table top before walking back the way he was going before. The girls looked at each other before giggling. “Why don’t we just get the dresses and fuck everyone else?” Roxy pumped her fist into the air and Jane immediately agreed.

                They walked down the stairs in a small group discussing where they were all going to go. The girls were heading to a dress shop the supplies, Jake was going to the ammo store then meeting up with Dirk for the pharmacy and electronics shop. They all agreed they’d meet there and once they went down several floors- showing despite their stature or body type how they still had stamina to beat most anyone. Dirk headed off in his own direction against the group, wondering around and coughing at times into his sleeve. He walked past a book store to check out their selection of manga while getting into a conversation with a girl about his glasses. Dirk still had trouble with social interaction- living in almost total isolation since he was small did a number on skills you were supposed to develop as a child. But the conversation went better than expected and soon Jake was there, bag full of ammo. They’d gotten the right to put in a shooting range in the attached part of Jake’s apartment, though it had been a ‘bitch and a half’ according to Dirk to sound proof. Roxy had even related them to the Teen Titans with how their apartments matched who they were and they could be super heroes.

                Jake had come up on Dirk, smiling at the other kindly. As they walked out of the pharmacy soon afterward, Jake shed his jacket. It was weird how Austin usually was somewhat chilly in the mornings and went into the scorching heat of midday. The blond did a double take at the other’s arm and blinked at it slowly. "You... got rid of that tattoo..." Dirk whispered eyes sad as he looked at the expansion of flesh and lowered his gaze as his fingertips hovered and then his hand dropped completely. Jake paused, biting his lip like he’d forgotten its existence entirely. “Yes…” Dirk didn’t say anything about that as they kept walking to meet at the electronic store. Jake had figured there would be a lot of yelling when Dirk discovered he’d gotten rid of the tattoo- though he found it more unsettling when the other didn’t say a word about it. Honestly he didn’t know what that meant. Was he too angry to speak? It was impossible to tell sometimes with the shades on that covered his cheeks well enough and his mouth was constantly an impassive stone when they were in public. “Dirk…” He started and the blond shook his head, “It’s the past.” He commented softly and Jake frowned, lowering his eyes again. This was one of those times he wished Dirk would be overbearing suddenly.

                As time went on standing around the outside of the electronic shop waiting for Roxy and Jane, Dirk coughed harder than he had before. Groaning softly, he leaned forward enough that his head was almost between his knees. Jake frowned, rubbing his back once more. “Maybe we should head back…” He commented quietly to have Dirk raise his head, “I’m fine. Here. Text Roxy to see where she’s at with Jane.” His phone, orange cased as usual, was offered to Jake like he had forgotten the other had his phone on him as much as Dirk did. Jake took the phone without a hitch, pausing when it vibrated in his hand with a ‘mew’ for Roxy’s ringtone. The screen lit up with a picture that he hadn’t seen in a long time. The selfie that he’d taken with Dirk, showing off their tattoos and their smiles- one of the few times Jake had seen the actual smile. They’d kissed almost immediately afterward, laughing enough if it was in masks most of the time. He stared at it for a moment before looking up at Dirk, who had his eyes shut and head leaned back.

                "You didn't delete it?" Jake asked looking at the phone in his hand and turned his head toward Dirk who didn't look at him or move his head. "Why would you do that? Remind yourself…" Jake figured it would be a bad memory for the other to constantly remind himself every time they talked or chatted. Dirk frowned then raised his head to look at him, brow furrowed behind his glasses, "Because maybe I wanted to remember it." Jake blinked, working his mouth, "I didn't mean it like that, Dirk." Dirk shook his head getting off the bench. "Never mind, just answer Roxy back and go in. I'm freezing." He growled walking away from him into the store. Jake frowned, looking up at the sun. It was approaching on near 100 degrees (F) already and he bit his lip, looking at the picture again. He forwarded it to his own phone and texted Roxy.

                The four walked around the store, Dirk being very thin lipped and Jake taking it as him still being angry. Roxy and Jane felt the other’s mood and took to their own area while Jake went on the other side of the rap albums where Dirk was. “I didn’t mean it like that, Dirk. I’m glad you kept the picture.” Dirk glanced at him, sweat on his brow, “Just because you got rid of the tattoo doesn’t mean I gonna rid of the picture. It kept me going in that hell zone- even if you weren’t interested anymore.” Jake sighed, “We’ve covered this, Dirk. We made our mistakes. I made more than one apparently.” The blond snorted, “Would you get it again?” He paused, working his mouth before clearing his throat, “If you really wanted me to.” Dirk rolled his eyes, “If you lied any worse…” Jake frowned, crossing his arms, “Well you don’t have to be like that. All riled about it.” Dirk held himself up by the CD case, “I don’t give a fuck about the tattoo, Jake. Just leave it alone.” He did a double-take at him, “I will not! You started this, now end it!” Dirk had turned to walk away and rounded on him, “I don’t want to fight with you, Jake!” Jake shrugged, “I don’t want you to fight with you either! I didn’t like the tattoo, there, I’m being honest!” Dirk gestured to him, “What else do you not like because back then you sure as hell liked it! Why did we even you do it if you didn’t even like it?!” The darker hair flung his hands in the air, “Because you pushed me to do it!”

                “Then maybe you should stop sending me so many mixed signals!” He near shouted back, so much for the not fighting part of their conversation. “Then stop being so pushy and let me be me!” Dirk looked exasperated. “When have I /ever/ told you that I didn’t like you for you! I love you!” Jake stopped talking then and so did Dirk. Roxy, Jane and the two store clerks were watching them with raised eyebrows, slightly wondering how this as going to turn out. “…I love you too, Dirk.” He mumbled, not expecting him to shout that in the middle of a ‘not’ argument.  And then Dirk was falling backward, jerking Jake back out of his thought process. “Dirk?!” He couldn’t catch him as fast as he fell. Jake was kneeling beside him, checking his pulse and feeling his forehead. “Call an ambulance!” He yelled at Roxy who was already on her cellphone, dark purple nails on her lips.

                Jane came by his side and Jake was shaking. “What’s his pulse?” Jake tried to steel himself like he usually did in the game but it was obviously no longer a game. He couldn’t kiss someone and bring them back to life. If Dirk died- it would be permanent… Permanent. Jane ended up hitting him up the side of the head and he shook himself, “What?” She looked in his eyes, “He’s passed out. He isn’t going to die. Breath.” The ambulance drove up eventually and they had to make a lot of things up about insurance and social security numbers. Dirk had forged a set of ID cards and they all honestly said they didn’t know their social security numbers- they didn’t even know if they had them. The hospital grudgingly accepted Dirk into a room and treated him as best they could.

                Jake continued to bite his fingernails as they waited. When the doctor came out he nearly ran to him, voice cracking, "What's wrong with Dirk? Is he alright?" The doctor paused before addressing him, “Mr. Strider is going to be fine. Too much stress and being as sick as he is just made him faint. No permanent or lasting damage. Though we do have him on oxygen.” The three sighed in relief and the doctor nodded, “You can go in and see him if you like.” Jake was the first one to mutter a half thank you before running for his life.  When Jake skidded in Dirk smiled at him. Roxy and Jane right behind him. He chuckled, voice muffled by the oxygen, "Where’s the fire?" Jake let out a breath, moving to him and taking his upper body into his arms in a tight hug. "You scared me so bad with your tomfoolery, Dirk." He muttered, glad he was smiling and Dirk wrapped an arm around him. "Hey, pumpkin, don't worry so much. You can’t kill me off with mean words.”

                Jake rested his forehead against his. “I thought you had a heart attack or- or something.” He muttered and Dirk shook his head, “Just passed out. Feverish.” There was a moment where he shook his head, “I’m alright, Jake.” He waved at Jane and Roxy who took up his other side and he hugged them both next. “Fine. When can I get out of here?” Dirk asked as Jane turned down the lights, “Thanks.” Roxy commented she would go check and Jake brushed his hair back. “I’m glad you’re alright.” Jake sighed softly when the other’s voiced that they agreed. “We clearly need to work out our communication skills, old chap.” Roxy came back in, saying tomorrow morning he was allowed to leave.

                There wasn’t much discussion after that. Card games were played before Roxy and Jane went back up to their apartment. They mentioned they were double dating tomorrow night and both boys had supported them completely. Dirk and Jake ended up having a long discussion about what happened- a real discussion where they actually listened to each other and worked it out. The nurses and doctors came by to check on them later that night, but mostly the two males had the night to themselves. Jane came in the next day with Roxy. Jake was sleeping beside Dirk in the hospital bed. The mask strapped onto his face and Jake woke first- Dirk being the heavier sleeper between them. Jake grinned at the orange cake she had in her arms and woke Dirk gently, "The girls brought a surprise, honey-bun." Dirk woke, looked over at the girls who were sheepishly smiling back at him. Dirk blushed, it was clearly seen since he didn't have his glasses and the lights were turned down for his sensitivity. "Ah shucks guys..." They ate there, sharing some with the nurses and before they returned Dirk’s clothing to check-out.

                It wasn’t nearly a long walk as it was before, Dirk and Jake walking hand in hand as the girls went out for their dates. The apartment was quiet and due to their understanding that sometimes they needed space. Dirk and Jake agreed that later on in the evening they’d have their own date while the girls were out, trying to reconnect. Even then, it was simple, something they both could agree on. Video games. Dirk, of course, picked his way into the living room after Jake had gone into his own apartment while carrying his controller and orange juice. He needed practice on what Jake wanted to play first and damn if English was going to beat him the first six rounds.

                After a while, Roxy came in with streaked mascara. “He was only after my tits.” She whispered sitting down beside Dirk, who pressed pause. “Need me to go beat him up?” Roxy shook her head, “Nah… Jane took care of it. I told her to stay with her date though. Nice guy who likes hats and pipes. Really sweet.” She sniffled. “Can I stay here for a bit… I don’t wanna be alone.” Dirk nodded, “Course. Jake will be over in a bit but I don’t think he’d mind with the night you’ve had.” Roxy smiled a little, “Thanks Dirk…” He pressed play as she talked about how the date went in detail. He made a rare comment. “I hope I find that someone one day.” She whispered, “You all did. Maybe there is someone for me…” Dirk nodded, “You will. Anyone would be lucky to have you.” Roxy simply shrugged his answer. He looked over at Roxy for a few moments before standing, marching over to the kitchen, pressing the pause button on his game as he went. She rose an eyebrow at the banging of pans and other items before he returned with a cup of hot steaming goodness of chocolate. Roxy blinked in surprised before grinning widely, her dimples showing. "Oh Dirk... Thank you..." The hot chocolate had small pink cat marshmallows and he sat beside her again, resuming the game. She rested her head on his shoulder watching the game and sipping the drink. After she fell asleep he wrapped her with a blanket and continued to play the game through the night until Jake came over to join him. Jake checked on her before sitting beside Dirk, Jane eventually joining Roxy in a blanket fort behind them. Several hours later, Dirk and Jake were cuddled together beside them.  
All was well.  
  
For now.

 

 


End file.
